Saturday, April 18, 2015

Being Brave

Tucker pretends to be his daddy a lot.
He picked a really great guy to pretend to be like.

Tucker has a pretty strong shy streak these days.
He does not enjoy being watched or noticed if he's somewhere new or what he thinks is uncomfortable.
Like church, the grocery store, the playground, his grandparents' house…you know places he shouldn't be at ease. What?
Yeah. Sometimes it makes me a little nutty when he rudely tells people not to look at him or tries to pull up my shirt to hide under (not my most glorious moments in public- I did just have a 4th baby & don't really love showing off my muffin top to just anyone. I digress.).
All because someone said hi or they like his shoes or something.

But as much as it can make me crazy that my awesome little boy hides like a turtle when people come near, I've noticed it bothers him too.
That's a tough one to take as a mom.
To me he is the picture of God's most perfect handiwork.
He's funny, silly, talented, cute, so handsome, has awesome curls in his hair, my only brown headed one, & is a tremendous friend to his sister, brothers & his favorite buddies (most of the time).

Naturally, I think he should be confident & not suffer from being shy at all.
But that is not his reality right now. That is my big picture goal for him.

So for now, we talk about being brave.
I told him a story the other day about his greatest hero, his dad.
How when he was a little boy he would hide his face in his Mimi & Papa's legs or shoulders.
How his uncle teased him about not knowing what he looked like unless he could see the back of his head...

"Dad used to be shy like me?"
And it hit me. "Yes. He did. But, God made him so brave.
And he's making you brave too."

I'm learning that being a mom is so much more about letting God work in my heart, than me trying to figure out how to change my kids.
Letting go & trusting God to work on the big stuff.
And isn't being brave what life's all about?
I have to be brave every morning when I climb out of bed & step into my generally messy kitchen to make breakfast for my tiny tribe, because every day holds something new & usually challenging.

Life is about trusting God when we really don't want to do something or are afraid of what's staring us in the face.
That never changes.

So Tucker & I have decided to be a little bit braver each day.
It's hard work for both of us.
Him tolerating being told he has cool shoes, me remembering God is in control of everything, if I let Him.
And together I think our bigger picture will be even better than what we could ever imagine.
God is good. I'm loving today with my shy guy & excitedly looking to all God has in store for him as he grows.
Even when my muffin top is showing.

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